


Up To No Good

by Hogwartsowls



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Marauders' Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-07
Updated: 2015-09-07
Packaged: 2018-04-19 11:44:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4745096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hogwartsowls/pseuds/Hogwartsowls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It never even happened! Ask James or Peter or Remus for Merlin’s sake and they’ll set you straight. I was in detention last night! I couldn’t possibly have been snogging anyone if I was in detention!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Up To No Good

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks again to Hailey for beta-ing this for me.

“Bloody hell!” Sirius shouted as he stormed into the Gryffindor dormitories. “These girls are going to kill me!” The door slammed loudly and Peter jumped, nearly upsetting his pot of ink.

James looked over at Sirius and the quill he had been levitating floated to the floor. “Rough night?”

“McKinnon broke it off with me because Bertha Jorkins told her she’d seen me snogging Florence Blebly behind the greenhouses!” Sirius tugged off his tie and dropped it into his trunk. He rummaged around and pulled out a pair of old sweatpants that may have belonged to Remus at one point.

“Well, did you?” Remus asked, not looking up from his book. “Because if you did, you can’t really be angry at Marlene for breaking up with you.”

Sirius grabbed the pillow off Peter’s bed and launched it at Remus’s head. “Of course I didn’t, you prick. I would never do that to a girl.”

“Snog them behind the greenhouses or cheat on them?” James inquired.

Sirius glared at him and shrugged on the sweatpants. James snickered and rolled over onto his half completed Potions essay.

“Why don’t you just go talk to her and tell her you didn’t do it?” Peter asked.

“So she can go throw her Charms textbook at me again? I don’t think so.”

“You could do with a bit of charm,” Remus commented, earning him another pillow to the face.

 

* * *

“Go away, Black,” Evans said the next morning when she saw Sirius approaching her and Marlene. Marlene rolled her brown eyes and pulled Lily in the opposite direction.

“I just want to explain. Marlene, please, can we talk for a minute?”

“Oh, so now you want to talk,” Evans said, rounding on him. “You didn’t want to talk yesterday when Marlene found you kissing Dirk Cresswell behind Greenhouse One!”

“Cresswell? You said that Jorkins told you I snogged Blebly! Where the hell did you hear I snogged Cresswell from!? I’m not gay!” Sirius sputtered.

“You know what, Black?” Marlene asked, tucking a piece of blond hair behind her ear. “You’re a terrible liar. Stay away from me.”

“Marlene, I’m not lying! Jorkins and whoever told you I kissed Dirk Cresswell are lying! I would never cheat on you!”

“Like I said, you’re a terrible liar, Black,” Marlene said. “Come on Lily, let’s go get some breakfast.”

Lily shot Sirius another glare over her shoulder as she followed Marlene into the Great Hall.

“Looking good, Evans!” James called as he caught up to Sirius. “So, you and McKinnon make up?”

“No,” Sirius said sourly. “She’s telling people that I’m gay and we broke up because she caught be snogging Cresswell.”

James threw his arm over Sirius’s shoulders and steered him towards the Gryffindor table. “Well Creswell’s a good looking bloke it that’s what you’re into.”

“I’M NOT GAY!” Sirius shouted as he sat down at the table. A few Hufflepuff girls tittered and Sirius’s ears burned bright red.

“You might want to say that a bit louder. I don’t think McGonagall heard you,” Remus said, biting into a piece of toast.

“Oh sod off,” Sirius grumbled as he reached for the eggs.

 

* * *

Sirius slunk into the common room that evening with a limp and clutching at his right arm. Peter looked up from his game of chess and scurried over to help him up the stairs to the dormitory. From her seat on the couch, Marlene smirked.

“What happened to you?” Remus inquired as Sirius and Peter limped their way to Sirius’s bed.

“Florence Blebly and Dirk Cresswell don’t approve of the rumors. Apparently, they heard from McKinnon that I’m bragging about being able to bed both of them at the same time. Florence left me some wicked bruises on my shins and I think Cresswell dislocated my shoulder.”

James rolled his eyes. “I think I have some bruise slave left over. Remus, check his shoulder would you.”

Remus nodded and waved his wand over Sirius’s injured shoulder. “You’re right, it is dislocated. Hold still, this might hurt. _Epiksey_.”

Sirius howled in pain as his bones popped back into place. Peter transfigured one of his old shirts into a sling and helped James tie it.

“Is that the only rumour you heard today?” Remus asked.

“Was there another one I should know about?”

Remus chewed at his lip. “Marlene asked me to go to Hogsmeade with her on Saturday.”

“What!?”

“I said no, of course,” Remus said quickly. “I just thought you should know.”

Sirius growled and climbed off the bed. When he got down to the common room he quickly spotted Marlene sitting with on the couch with Lily and Mary MacDonald.

“You asked Remus to go to Hogsmeade with you on Saturday?” Sirius asked in greeting.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business. You seem to have no qualms dating other people. At least I had to decency to breakup with you before I asked Remus out,” Marlene said, turning the pages in her Transfigurations text book idly.

“So you’re going to go out with my best friend as revenge for something I didn’t even do? That’s hardly fair, Marlene.”

Marlene snapped her book shut and glared up at Sirius. “Something you didn’t even do? Someone _saw_ you, Sirius. How can you say you didn’t cheat on me when there is _eyewitness proof that you did_!”

“No one saw me! It never even happened! Ask James or Peter or Remus for Merlin’s sake and they’ll set you straight. I was in detention last night! I couldn’t possibly have been snogging anyone if I was in detention!”

“Detention with Professor Sprout, wasn’t it?” Lily asked, her green eyes glinting. “You were repotting snapping magnolias in the greenhouses, weren’t you? So that does place you at the scene of the crimes.”

“See, this just proves my point,” Marlene huffed.

Sirius groaned and ran a hand through his messy hair. “When are you going to listen to me? I didn’t cheat on you! I never kissed Blebly or Cresswell! Bertha Jorkins lied to you!” Sirius protested.

This caught Mary’s attention. “Wait, you heard that Sirius cheated on you from Bertha? Marlene, you know she has a huge crush on Sirius! She would do anything to get him all to herself. Why would you listen to her?”

Sirius rounded on Mary. “Hold on a minute. Bertha Jorkins likes me and would be willing to destroy her friendship with Marlene just to go on a date with me?”

“Well, they’re not really friends. Bertha is really quite rude. I’m not sure she has any friends,” Mary stammered.

“She has no real friends, fancies Sirius and stages a huge scene to get him to break up with Marlene so she could have a go at him,” James summarized. He flopped down on the sofa next to Lily, who not-so-subtly moved closer to Mary.

“It would seem that way,” Remus said as he and Peter joined the group.

“What’s she got against Florence and Dirk?” Peter inquired.

“Well, she’s a bit put out at Florence at the moment,” Lily said. “She’s dating Bertha’s ex-boyfriend.”

“Who was her boyfriend?”

“Dirk Cresswell,” Marlene whispered. She gazed up at Sirius again. “You really didn’t cheat on me?”

“I swear on my life as a Marauder, I did not cheat on you,” Sirius said solemnly, crossing his heart.

“Oh Sirius, I’m so sorry,” Marlene cried. She threw herself at Sirius, who wrapped her in a hug and kissed her hair.

“It’s alright, love, you didn’t know.”

“But I should have! It was all there, I was just too mad at you to notice!” Marlene whimpered into Sirius’s hair. “And I said all those terrible things about you and Dirk…”

“How did you even hear that I was snogging Cresswell anyhow?”

“Well, Bertha said that she’d seen him leaving the greenhouses around the same time you were supposedly kissing Florence. She made it seem like you had been snogging him as well.”

Sirius frowned. “I’m a bit put out here, love. How could you think that I was gay? You should have known that I’m in love with you.”

Marlene’s brown eyes gazed up at Sirius in awe. “Really?”

“How could you not know? I’ve been crazy about you for years Marlene Elizabeth McKinnon.”

“Sirius…” Marlene whispered just as Sirius claimed her mouth. Her arms looped around his neck and Sirius pulled her closer. His lips nudged hers open and his tongue –

“Oi, can we get on with it?” James interrupted. “I would like to start plotting revenge on Bertha Jorkins if you don’t mind.”

“Thanks for that Prongs,” Sirius muttered and he and Marlene claimed the vacant arm chair. “Way to spoil the mood.”

James merely shrugged and leaned back against the sofa.

“Anyone have any ideas? Bertha really needs to be taught a lesson. No one messes with my friends,” Lily said defensively.

“I didn’t think you had it in you, Evans. And here I was thinking that you detested our pranks all these years when in reality you wanted to be in on them,” James commented.

“Oh, shut up, Potter.”

“I think we should include Florence and Dirk in whatever we do,” Marlene interjected. “They deserve it after what Bertha did to them and I need to apologize.”

“I think I have just the idea,” Sirius said gleefully. “Alright, here’s what we’re going to do.”

**Author's Note:**

> So this might end up getting a sequel if I ever get around to it. Or figure out what it is that these dumb boys have planned...


End file.
